Friday, March 30, 2007

i'm so du lan now. one moment, i can think of so many things to write. then the next, i forgot what i wanted to type. eh, i'm not du lan about this lah. it's just some problems. sigh... and my angry feeling now is making this post a bit 'rough'. so pardon me.

happy birthday to Julian! celebrating his birthday tml. woohoo.. and tell u guys what.. i think he likes someone. lol. i think he likes........ xxxx xxx. i shan't said who issit. and those who know, please keep your mouth shut.
and my mom just told me tat i can't go home late becoz she's coming home after 6. what the hell. and she complained that i always skipped choir. all i can say is, sharlynn also what... then she got nothing to say. shucks, i'm talking about sharlynn again.

i'm very pissed today. how much time will you actually take, to find a teacher to talk about your project? an hour plus plus? it wasn't even raining in the 1st place. if it's not for you who wanted to find the teacher, if it's not you who wanted me to wait for you to end your lesson and go home with you, if it's not for you, i wouldn't be waiting for you for 2long hours, just to go home with you in the heavy rain. i felt like a sucker. so pathetic. the rain got bigger every second and you are like, taking your own sweet time? i was waiting for you in 3S5 for so long, and you came back and use that not-so-nice-or-rather-an-attituded tone to ask if i going home anot. wat the fuck. i waited for you for the bloody two hours and you came back, carry your bag, and started to grumble at me for being slow, like you in a rush to go home like that. what's more, you won't even want to share an umbrella with me. fine, i did bring an umbrella, and i didn't use it, so? you didn't even ask if i wanted to share. you know how lazy i am. you know how the fucking lazy i am! but what did you do? you let me walked in the f big rain and you walked so slow in front of me. HELLO?? i'm umbrella-less! fine, i can't blame you, for it's me myself and i, who doesn't want to use my f umbrella. and you know what, this shows me what a friend you are. i felt so sucked up. why am i so stupid to wait for you for 2 hours, which i can use to type a happy blog rather than an angry blog now, and then let you reprimend me for being slow, and giving me the what-the-f-slow person you are look. hey gal. becoz of you, i had to cancel my meeting with ying jie to buy julian's present o k a y. and this made yj not so happy. and now, what do you know? all you know is you have soo ching to be there for you. same class, same lesson, whatever, whatver. what bout me? how about the outing tml? you didn't tell me earlier that you going out with sooching, and so will be skipping choir. somemore, you're going out with soo ching and leaving me out. what the hell? you didn't even ask me if i wanted to hang out with you guys. and your meaning is, expecting me to go choir all by myself. weren't i your friend? is this how you treated me? and when i hinted you to ask me if i wanted to go, what did you say? you said: aiya, you always got something on...
so what now? my fault again? so everything is my fault. you didn't even ask, how did you know i'm not free? i'm so hurt. i'm so hurt. i'm soooooooo hurt... oh, so that's the bad point for me being stupid. i'm so stupid that i got the grades that i was unable to get into the same class as the both of you, and that pulls our relationship further. i thought we could last. i thought we could last for as long as we want. but i don't think i can take it anymore. you have sc, may has leanna. i have no one. who's there for me? now, who's my best friend? i'm already very not happy with may. it's like we didn't even talk for so fucking fucking fucking long time. it's like leanna had just stole my best friend away from me. i kept quiet, i din say anything. coz i know i'm wrong if i blame her. and... coz i believe i still got you, i still got soo ching.
no more. not any more. i feel like ending everything. but i know i can't. i hate you sometimes. but i can't end it, i know i just cant. everything is so numb now. i feel so numb. is this really my life? who's my true friend?

what is a friend? tell me the bloody defination of a friend. if you say that a friend is someone who shares your problems and be there with you through thick and thin, i'm tell you, i have none. and that isn't the best defination. someone whom you just known for one day, is also called your friend. but he/she doesn't share his/her problems with you. so what is a friend? if a friend is whom you share your problems with, then what about a good friend?, and what about best friends?! does that means that your best friend is the one who's willing to die for you? if that's so, then what's a boyfriend/girlfriend? what's bigger than sacrificing you life to suit a 'boyfriend' or 'girlfriend'?
everything is soso wrong. i'm being left out. left out by everyone. so, issit all my fault?

all i wanted to find, was a true, best friend. someone who treats me as his or her best friend, and not just a simple girl, a simple friend.
-
sorry guys, i didn't know i just crapped so much bout my feelings. it's unbearable. tears... sigh. to think that i'm so stupid to believe that a friend is forever, that a friend is somebody who will be there for you when you need them, and that a friend is someone WHO WON'T LEAVE YOU OUT. stupid me... sorry for that whole big paragraph.

argh, i don't feel like blogging anymore. i'll blog when i wanted ok. du lan. i hope, someday, i may just sleep, and never ever wake up. i'll feel much better, i suppose?

i'll upload pictures next time. i don't have the time now.

tags-
ks: lols, i don't want. anyways, it's suppose to be small. so, i'll let it be. sorry lehh.. but anyways, i my suggestion is that you copy the text you want to read and paste it in the notepad and then read. sorry for the trouble. thanks for tagging me back. really sorry for the small font, hurting your eyes. nope, no reasons why your name is totodile. i had said, it's just random names. well, ok, charizard you shall be. haha..
gina: nvm lah. haha.. it's okay(:
corrina: i never link you meh?! D:

Labels: friends sucks sometimes

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

finally, speech day was over. the performance today was not-so-bad afterall. sara said this is the 1st time she hear us sing so nice. lol. making up and changing up took us around 1h30min. and today, ade and tiffy helped me put eyeliner. to me, i looked punk. omigosh. i was thinking that putting eyeliner after i cut my hair and spike it, would be a fantastic idea. argh, but people saw me and said i looked different, my eyes so big, and worse of all, they teased that i didn't get enough sleep. RAHH. you guys don't know wad's eyeliner? lunatics. LOL. anyways, i'm sorry to tiffy and ade tat i cant go for the ice skating. oh and after changing back to uniform, we went back only to find that sharlynn and me doesn't have a share for the free meal for us by miss chua. whothefuck took more than 1 share? god knows. well, anyways, the girls complained that the teacher is cheap skate. the kfc's shroomburger, which is the free meal, contains only a piece of plain, thin meat, in between 2 pieces of burger-bread.

saw a shop lifting act today when passing a mamashop. 2boys, yes BOYS (coz dey are childish as said by sharlynn), stole things from the mamashop and ran away, leaving an uncle to shout and chase after them. lucky for them, the uncle's slow and they are fast.
okok, say i'm a mad, but, for the 2 boys, all i can say is : this is called courage.

pictures up ahead. i'll reply tags in the next post yea? till then, cya.
-
ok this when i went out with penghwee and his richass friend - hong jun. (i can't really rmb the name. sorry if wrong. issit hong jun or jun hong?)

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

lols. people have been complaining about my text size. awwhh man. what's so bad about a small text? =P
it helps you to train your eyesight. for those who really cannot see, then very sorry lor.. haha..

ok lah. this post, i make it bigger(:

i haven't been posting for like, around a week? and i'm back here! using my fingers to press my so-call-white keyboard. my sis just bought a new computer. acer. and it's windows vista. it's damn cool. but the prob is, idunnowhy, the internet couldn't work on that com. so after much hastle, my sis moved the modemn back and 'activated' this computer to use internet. sigh, now all i can wait for is this friday, `cuz my mom said she's going to sign thedunnowhatthingy, so that both my computers can use the internet. hoorays! but, i'm suppose to use the old one. i can only use the new computer when my sis's not at home. reason is, coz i didn't pay a single cent in buying that new computer. LOL.

don't bother to ask me how was my week. because i myself don't even remember. i could only remember staying back for school everyday for choir practice. it's kinda irritating when you have to (invertedcomma)waste(invertedcomma) your precious time you use to sleep, play computer, watch tv, do homework, or whatsoever, to sing the songs again and again. but after much consideration, i think it's perfectly fine with me. i love singing, although my singing meant pop songs, but i don't mind singing the songs that are nice to hear. but i do complain when the place we were standing in/on was hot. i will become restless and will start to feel damn moody as i sweat. phew, lucky the air-con in the music room was fixed!

alright, enough about my choir. i had also heard rumours of this and that and that and this. i've had enough. rumours. can rumours be trusted? haha, what if it can be? it's none of my business. although i am curious. but, i guess i'm just being nosey. whatever, lol. i don't care what's going on with other people. as long as it doesn't affect me, go ahead. oh, and songjiaheiscute. haha.

and daryl, you shouldn't "brag" about your bunny+plaster to me. you aren't making me jealous okay. i know i can't do one for you. and you know i'm not that pro. oh, and don't make me steal it. HAHAHA. alamak, if you miss her, go tell her luhs... fancy telling me you miss someone, and expect me to reply you something.? i don't even know who you are missing!

i had wanted to upload a few photos. but i guess i'll do it either tomorrow or some other day. i don't think i have the mood to upload it now. and tonight, i'm going to ask my sister to download the mp3 resizer for me. i can't take it anymore! my handphone no space! and i still want to collect more nicenicesupernice english songs! RAHHHH. okay, so wait for the pictures to be uploaded. happy waiting!
-
tags-
ks: opps. really sorry. hehe =x
dum: eh? who're you? =x er? what's wrong with me? that's a good qn. i'm mad. xD
adeline: lols, i dunno leh? i think there's no answer to the qn. aaron didn't know the answer too. maybe, like what daryl had said, it's just to confuse your mind.?
waiseng: hey dude! so sorry. i can't online, that's why... i'll tag you whenever i online der. okok, bigger words already. LOL. i don't know the answer. i think there's no answer to the qn. aaron didn't know the answer too. maybe, like what daryl had said, it's just to confuse your mind.?
-
oh and i think it's alvin's birthday a few days ago. i shan't shout out loud about this. coz i wasn't so sure if it's really his birthday. so, a small little happybirthdaytoyou to alvin chew. lol...

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Sharlynn and me were sitting at the 4 or 5 steps stairs behind the hall when Mrs Bala walked up from the staircase and towards the back door of the office.
*she walked past, stared and then pointed at us*
Sharlynn thought she was pointing to our handphone, so she quickly hide hers.
-
i was wondering, POINT WHAT POINT. PRINCIPLE ALLOW US TO USE IT AFTER SCHOOL. AND IT'S AFTER SCHOOL NOW. NO WAY YOU ARE CONFISCATING IT.
-
"HEY YOU. sit properly! you are a girl, you know!"
*shocked*
we quickly close our legs (we didn't even open it THAT big! it's like normal sitting luhhs!)
"i say sit properly! you girls, don't think you got wear shorts, you can sit like that!"
i got angry and stood up. i glared at her for a second and then move away in a what's-your-fucking-problem way. i'm so pissed. after she got inside the office, i sat down there at the same spot again. this time, i open my leg bigger.

mother fucker. what's with you?? pms again? 365days everyday also pms? what the fuck. sit you also want to complain. cheebye lah. everything also want to complain. think for others can anot. who tell you to see? who tell you to be SO PERVERTIC TO SEE IF WE DID WEAR SHORTS? what if we didn't wear? then we can sue you for being pervertic to see our undies lah? bloody hell. how we sit is our business. all you need to do is go right into the god-damn office and do what you want. what for scold us for sitting so im-pro-per-ly?! i want to sit like that cannot ar? YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS MEH? i LOVE sitting like that, cannot ar? i ALWAYS sit like that, CANNOT AR? sikina nia... who are you to reprimend us like that? fuck you lah. this is the school. not YOUR BLOODYFUCKING HOUSE. we like to sit with our legs as big as possible, your business meh? it's not as if we having SEX in front of you what. damn you. even if you want to so-call protect us from the guys see-ing, but, what's with that sucking tone of yours? i so wanna slap you. i so wanna talk back to you. maybe i should try next time. argh, you so black already still want get angry over such thing. more angry, more heat, more black; more chao da leh. you baba black sheep. learn only how to baa-baa-baa, please. you don't even deserve to learn how to speak human language. you pms-ing sheep...
oh! and today, somebody, i shan't say who, told me a joke:
what's the difference between a bucket of shit and an indian.
the answer is:
the difference is the bucket.
conclusion:
there's NO difference between indian and a pile of shit.
it's damn funny luhs!

--
bleahs.
control, qinghui, control.
scolding her can't make any difference.
thinking about it will make you even more mad.
you can't be scolding every teacher that "provokes" you.
i know it's really making you mad, but you got to control.
sigh...
control, qinghui, control.
you can't keep poking him, you know.
you can't keep having the urge to tickle him...
letting go means letting go.
forgetting means forgetting.
if you're gonna make him get close to you again, you're gonna get hurt once more.
dont wanna care is dont wanna care.
having the urge to "get in touch" with him will just make things go worse.
don't you wanna get out of all these things?
don't you wanna go your way and him - his way?
maybe he won't ever get close to you, no matter what you do.
but, everything can be possible.
you don't want to step into his life again, isn't it?
you don't wanna pollute your mind with his face rite?
you don't want to get so close to him, afraid of getting hurt again, aint it?
so why are you still poking, tickling and playing with him?
control, girl, you got to control.
get out of his sight.
don't keep taking glances at him.
stop thinking that he's also taking glances at you.
stop thinking of the past.
be like ying jie!
-
YING JIE IS A STRONG GIRL :D
sigh. how to possibly get him out of my mind?
how to possibly totally forget about him and carry on with my life?
i always tell myself studies comes first now.
i keep talling myself, we can only be friends.
but what am i hoping for...?
a re-unite? BLEAHS.
-
control. control. control.
stop, and i mean stop, trying to get his attention.
stop trying to tickle him or poke him.
you've had enough of his nonsence.
and there's a limit to certain things.
--

i'm happy. `coz xing quan didn't choose to ignore me all his life. but i'm sad. coz he had changed. he's... too "cool" for me. alamak. where's the old you? you promised to teng wo de leh.. you now so cool, i also scared of you luh :(


something extraordinary happened today. there's a small bat in our school. i was like, Oh my gosh. it's so damn bloody - cute! ahhhh.. i can't take a photo of it. coz it's quite high up there. picure won't be clear. i keep go and disiao it, making all sorts of noise. and it's like turning it's head to look at me. hehe. so cute lor!! wuzee keep saying he and changhong can catch it. then i keep saying, ok lah, you catch it down for me lah~ lols. and today's choir is so boring. our singing sucks. and most of all, of coz, the conductor sucks like hell. we all agreed that we sing better without the conductor. haha..


may... may... may... sharlynn... sharlynn... sharlynn... soo ching... soo ching... soo ching... stop saying me and duckie ok... we are friends. and we aren't that close. the duck's not interested in me, ok. so, we're only classmates. -.-" stop grinning whenever he talks to me =/

ah, julian's a funny chap!
there are 10 fishes in a tank.
2fish died. and there left 8.
did the level of the water in the tank sink or rise?
answer:
rise. because the other 8fish felt so sad over the death of the 2fish, they cried and cried, resulting in the rise of water level.

and another came from aaron. or rather, aaron's friend.
there was once 3 pple who went to a restaurant to eat. the bill came and it's $55. each one of them paid $20, which sums up to $60. the waiter gave them back their $5 change. the 3 of them decided to give $2 out of the $5 change to the waiter as tip, leaving the remaining of $3 to share among the 3 of them - which means that each of them gets $1 back. and that also meant that they paid $20 and got back $1, meaning that they had paid $19 each.
but think about it. $19 multiply by 3 is equals to $57. $57 add together with the tip - $2. it's $59. so where's the other $1?
haha.

tag-
WW: eh paiseh. lols.. you never ask from me... i teach you when you ask lor.. anyways, i not tat pro also.. haha.. i only know the basics.

Labels: my weakpower to control myself

Sunday, March 18, 2007

ah dots. please remind me to copy 2 timetable for both daryl and julian. thanks people.

tags-
evon: oh haha.. names are just randomly assigned to people~
gina: oh yea. paiseh.. haha.. i'll take note. sorry. and i will relink too(: tcare gurl.
caRI: hellos, carissa(: thanks for tagging! names are randomly assigned! xD
beebee: lols. sorry beebee. SORRY. haha. is this big enough? =P
yourclassmate: hello, my classmate. NAMES ARE RANDOMLY ASSIGNED. lols..
jaredd: haha. actually.. you should say there's alot of "hui"s. haha.. i know alot of people with names ending or starting with "hui".. oh, yea, you should get a thicker glass. HAHA

Labels: sianzation

Saturday, March 17, 2007

lols. i've reached my 100th post.

just wanna say happy birthday to leejinghui~
her birthday falls on today.

gina: thanks. and also thanks for tagging! haha.. tcare gurl :]

Labels: sianzation

Friday, March 16, 2007

went bugis today with my cousin and mom, and i bought a zinc bag. the bag tat i wanted was not in stock. and i like the guy selling me the bag. ask me who it is. he's service is super good and he's funny and nice.. my mom says: he's not uncle lah... he's 'korkor'...
haha. then after buying slippers too, we went back to je. And we went to take neoprint. gosh, it turned out - not that nice.
after eating long john - cousin's dinner - , i saw yulun, ryan, yi herng, julian, and some other fuhua seniors. what luck... i tried not to look at them. and they were like, trying to see if that's me. HAHA. morons =x

i'm gonna reply people's post here, okay? HERE:
evon: lols, i mean, excluding me luhhs.. which is you! so, er.. congrats for being the 1st to tag.. thanks for tagging~
fengheng: lols. thanks kor~ HAHA.. i can't possibly put as 'watermelon' mah... coz it's suppose to be imaginary friend. haha.. so i use doramon lor... =x

Thursday, March 15, 2007

oh ya. i forgot bout my birthday wishes to people. hehe. since i didn't blog for a long time... so spare me yea?

happy birthday to FuWei, HQ and TingFang. their birthday all falls on the 7th march. so cool, all on the same day.
happy birthday to SiYun, who's birthday falls on the 8th march.
happy birthday to dianyong, who's birthday falls on the 11th march.

after midnight today, it'll be esther tan's birthday! woohoo.
so a happy birthday to her as well!


best wishes everyone :D

Labels: birthday wishes

hoho. i changed my blogskin. issit nice?

and also, i wanna apologise to gina.. coz i din reply her tag. =x sorry gurl. tcare hor..

Labels: new life?

Friday, March 09, 2007

holiday's here.
hope it'll be a long one.

thanks to tata for accompany-ing me after school.
saw honeydew when i walking out of the staffroom x)

there's too much math homework. oh gosh... guess maybe i'll be having nightmares about solutions and sums and tons and tons of numbers.

and i have to thanks daryl for chatting with me during bored times and also sending me the canon song. canon in D just rocks luhs xD

andilovetechno`

-

reply me please. it has been the 5th day since you last talked to me. how will i know if those gangsters didn't pester you again? how will i know if you are ok?! reply me lah! argh.

fuck.

Labels: stress

Monday, March 05, 2007

-

wasn't in the mood to blog.

I had a very bad night yesterday. Things were finally sorted out. And i know one thing: I'm never getting him back, never ever. I don't have the reason to make him stay. The longer he stays, the longer he gets hurt. The longer he gets hurt, the longer i feel guilty. I don't want him to stay. But what's making me so sad? What's hurting me. Gosh... I'm so confused. I created this traps here and there, without me realising it, and he fell right into it. He said nothing will help get those knifes out of his heart; nothing seems to hurt him anymore. He meant he had no feeling by then, because i broke his heart. He knew he was in the trap all along. But he didn't mind. Yet, i set one trap after another, and again and again, he walked into the trap. Man... But all along he didn't mind. Worse comes to worse, i wasn't at all seriously touched. I treated him like i always wanted to: as a brother; someone who will love me for eternal. I don't ask for a boy/girl those kind of love. I wanted a brotherly love, you get it? I don't think you do.

I cried for the whole night yesterday. I lied on the bed and cried throughout the whole night. I wasn't able to get to sleep. I tried listening to songs, so that i could drift off to sleep. But that doesn't help. I seem to cry even more. I fred that my sis will find out i was crying, so i didn't dared to make noise. I suffered that whole night, it's a living nightmare. And then... i finally fell asleep.

This morning, when i woke up, my eyes were sore as ever. I didn't know it was that visible, until my friend's band senior walked past and commented that my eyes are so sore. He could even see when there's not really a strong source of light shining on my face.

Argh. I felt so... undescribable. No one will understand. And i don't wish anyone will. I'm going to concentrate on my studies. To stay or to leave, it's his choice. I'm left with nothing at all now, so i don't care.

All i know is... I don't have anymore reason to make him stay. All i can do, is to hide in one corner and cry; shutting myself out from the whole world, by listening to music. How pathetic. Sigh..

-

Should i be happy that he left? Or should i just be plain stupid, to wait for him to return my smses?

I'm crying again...

- - -

- -

-

Labels: a happy occasion after a sad one ; AND VICE VERSA

Friday, March 02, 2007

after school today...
~
daryl: aiyo, sian, nothing to do...
me: eh daryl, we go your house play lah =x
daryl: *laughing* you siao lah. hahaha (flicking his finger at me)
me: *laugh*
*daryl continue talking to favian*
(then favian turn around)
favian: eh, qinghui, daryl say you go his house to rape him leh. HAHAHA.
me: huh... *laughing* no lah... i go his house not to rape him... is to rape his house. hahaha.
daryl: HAHA. ya ya... don't rape my lao po lah.. hehe.
me: who's your lao po?
daryl: my house lor... hahhaha, just joking...
me: i tot ur lao po is ur guitar?
daryl: yaya.

-

lols. funny lah.. lao po here and there. wahaha. yays, common test is over. now not worried if the test is difficult anot. now is starting to worry for the marks or if we will pass anot. man, i really hope i pass all sia...

waiseng and yulun cut their hair. wahhh, when i saw waiseng's hair, i was like... O______O omg. u cut ur hair?! lolss... and i was really sad lahh.. i like his hair so much.. so nice luhs. then not he cut away :( daryl's one so long he also never cut.. daryl you better don't cut!~ D:

anyways, here are some birthday wishes to people:
happy birthday to soo ching who's birthday falls on 26thFEB.
happy birthday to carissa who's birthday falls on 28thFEB.
happy birthday to kengsia who's birthday falls on 1stMAR.
and also, an early birthday wish to sharlynn:
happy birthday to sharlynn who's birthday falls on 3rdMAR.

this few days, i keep asking people for themes. coz i creating blogskins. wahaha. not really blogskins lah.. but i just boring boring nothing do, den keep drawing on foolscape paper. i'm quite satisfied with my own product leh.. the first one is a hand pointing middle finger. then the second one is about stars (theme came up by carissa), and the third one is about pig (theme came up by gina). haha.. and today, i slept during s.s. lesson today. i din even noe i fell asleep. when i woke up, the teacher is like, walking out of the class. gosh, i missed out alot. peichuan tried sleeping during chemistry lesson. bad move, pc. lols. coz the `cher found out and scolded him.

to gina: lols, i dun look pretty in anyway - whether i smile or not. so it doesn't matter. i was really pissed, so i can't control my mood.. i really feel like KILLING her man. i wan stand out in front of her and scold her all those vulgarities ; not caring if i will get suspended anot. seriously. but then on 2nd thoughts, 3S5 that form `cher even worse. LOLS. i told my fren in that class that, if i were in 3S5, i wouldn't have had survived. argh, teachers give me attitude, i pay back the tooth, attitude them back. then in the end i tio point finger at say i attitude them. wth. `chers want pupils to listen to their crapping attitudes and nod their head in agreement. so sad to say, i'm not tat kind. i'm not those kind of pple who will sit there and let the `chers give attitude. i'm the rebellious type.

Labels: common test over

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Qing Hui is my name, and they call me DAJIE. I'm SunWuKong in a group called Siao You Ji , and it lives by its given name. Being a Fuhua Choir-ian, i love music. Born on 6thFEB1992. & currently, i've got 9earholes. Waiting for the age to have a tattoo, i'm thinking of tongue piercing.
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