Wednesday, April 18, 2007
funny jokes for you guys...
lol.
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PARADISE REGAINED.A funeral service is being held in a synagogue for a woman who had just passed away.
At the end of the service, the pallbearers are carrying the casket out, when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan.
They open the casket and find the woman is alive. In fact, she lives for ten more years!
Alas, she finally dies and the funeral is again held at the same synagogue. At the end of the ceremony, the pallbearers are carrying out the casket. As they are walking down the aisle, the husband cries out, "
Watch out for the wall!!"
-
Doris was fleeing from a fire in her home. She carried a dog in her lap.
Fireman: Lady, is your husband still in the house?
"Yes," replied the woman.
"Then why don't you get him out instead of the dog? He'll burn to death."
"
Don't worry," replied the woman, "
He won't burn. He's taking a shower."
-
YOU HAVE TWO CHOICES IN LIFE; EITHER YOU STAY SINGLE AND BE MISERABLE; OR GET MARRIED AND WISH YOU WERE DEAD.-
At a staff meeting, the Boss felt that he wasn't getting any respect.
The next day, he bought in a small sign that read,
'I'm the Boss'. He then taped it to his office door.
Later that day, when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign and said, "
Your wife called, she wants her sign back!"
-
LOVE THY NEIGHBOURWhen the husband arrive home from office, his wife said, "Darling, could you please change the bulbs in our living room lights?"
Husband: "Am I an electrician?"
The next day, she approached her husband again, "Dear, would you please fix the leaky bathroom tap?"
"Am I a plumber?" retorted the husband.
The following day, the husband arriving home from work finds everything fixed.
"Who fixed it?" he asked his wife.
"Our helpful next-door neighbour," replied the wife.
"Did he ask for anything?" enquired the curious husband.
"Yes dear. He requested that I either bake a cake for him or sleep one night with him."
"So, you baked him a big cake?" asked the husband.
The wife replied, "
Am I a baker?!"
-
A guy, in his office, was boasting to his friend how much he loved his wife.
A friend asked him, "What is the colour of her eyes?"
The guy was speechless. He didn't know.
Immediately he went home and entered the bedroom. The wife was lying on the bed with her eyes wide open. He looked at her eyes and said, "Ah, brown."
Hearing this, Mr Brown came out from under the bed and said, "
How the hell did you know i was here??"
-
My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburettor. I asked where the car was, she told me, "
In the lake."
-
A burglar enters a house in the middle of the night. He was interrupted when the owner awoke.
Drawing his gun, the burglar said, "Don't move or I'll shoot. I'm hunting for your money."
"
Let me turn on the light," replied the victim, "
and I'll hunt with you!"
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alright. that's all for today. hope you get the jokes. lolzz.
Labels: funny
♥ the world will turn WILD.
6:24 PM